"I look as forward to this as I do to my period," Anna said, checking her eyes in the mirror while Jason drove. He shrugged and switched lanes while she reached forward to fiddle with the radio dials.
"I know it's not the most pleasant way to spend an evening, but it's something we've done since I was a kid," Jason said, "Besides, you like my brother, don't you?" "Like's too strong a word," Anna said. "...tolerates?" "This is getting awkward," Anna said, flipping the mirror shut and looking at him, "I'm just saying, why can't your family do something different? Why can't they...I don't know, go out bowling or...or maybe just have a family dinner? Why does it have to be game night? We all know how it's going to go. It ends the same way every week." "Well, how about this, if things don't go a bit smoother this week, we'll either threaten to not come next week, or we'll leave early, yeah?" Jason asked, "That sound ok?" Anna smiled as he reached over, pulled her head to his and kissed the side of it. They came to a red light and stopped, when Anna pointed at Jasons window. Jason turned and saw a moped beside their car, then rolled his window down and leaned out of it a bit. The girl on the moped pulled her helmet visor up a bit and smiled at him. "Hey," she said, "Tell mom I'm gonna be a little late, I have to pick something up." "I can do that," Jason said, then sighed, "Do you know what the game is tonight?" "Chutes and Ladders," Ashley said, "Dad texted me earlier to tell me. So, another childhood classic, forever scarred...where's Belle?" she asked, craning her neck to look inside the car. "Please," Jason said, "I'm not going to bring my children to a family get together." Ashley laughed as the light turned green. She dropped the visor on her helmet, kicked the peddle and took off. Anna looked at Jason and smirked. "What?" Jason asked. "Your sister's fuckin' cool," Anna said. *** "I'm sick and tired of playing second fiddle to a guy who once had a Bride of Frankenstein poster on his wall because he thought she was hot," Carl said, sitting at the island counter in the family kitchen, face resting on his fists. "You know that was you, right?" their father, Harold said, "That was your poster." "...yeah, well, there's nothing I can make fun of him for, because he's perfect!" Carl replied, "Just once, one time, I wish someone would look at the two of us standing next to one another, and say 'You know what, Carl, you really are a lot cooler than Jason'. Just once, is that too much to ask?" "Does this person know you personally?" Harold asked as he set down a block of cheese and started cutting it. "...no?" "Then how'd they know your names?" "...We're wearing nametags," Carl said, annoyed. "So in this alternate reality, you guys just wear nametags on the off chance that someone comes up to you to make brash character judgements?" Harold asked, eating a slice of cheese. Carl groaned, clearly frustrated, as he reached for the block of cheese to cut himself a few slices. "That isn't the point! Even my prom date ended up going with him because he's the better looking one!" Carl said, "And she was blind!" "That one must've hurt, yeah," Harold said, "...but about this nametag thing, is that everyone has to wear them, is it optional? Or is this just something you and Jason decided on so that-" "Forget the nametags!" Carl shouted. "Who's wearing nametags?" Betty asked, coming into the kitchen from the foyer, putting her bracelet on around her right wrist. "Nobody is wearing nametags!" Carl shouted. "You know, they gave us nametags at work one time when I was in my twenties," Harold said, "It was when I was working at that photo place off Main and 3rd, remember Bets? I guess they thought it was weird for strangers to be developing photos of like, peoples family vacations and children and so they wanted to make it more personal, make it like we were old friends or something, so they made us wear nametags. Stupidest idea ever." "I swear to god, the next person to say the word nametag is not going to leave this kitchen alive," Carl said through gritted teeth, "I will kill both of you and then I will kill myself." "You know what they say," Harold said, "The family who slays together stays together." Just then there was a knock at the door. Betty scrambled off to answer the door as Carl and Harold handed the cheese block and knife back and forth, each eating their slices. Harold sighed, chewing, paused in thought. "You know, wearing a name tag is probably the best way to not get murdered," Harold said, "I mean, who's gonna murder someone they know the name of?" "I know your name, I'm about to murder you," Carl said. Just then Jason, Betty and Anna came into the kitchen. Jason hugged Harold, while Anna patted Carl on the back and pulled up a stool beside him at the island counter. "Ashley's going to be a little late, she's picking something up. We can set the board up and stuff and I'm sure she'll be here before we start the game," Jason said, as Harold nodded and headed out to set the board up. Betty looked at Anna and smiled. "I love your hair, sweetheart," she said, "Did you just have it done?" "Yeah," Anna said, running her fingers through it, "It's...it's a little different, I was kinda nervous at first, but I think I like it." "It looks adorable," Betty said. "What about me? I got a haircut last week, you didn't say I looked adorable," Carl said. "What, competing with me isn't enough, you gotta compete with my wife now?" Jason asked. "I just want some recognition," Carl said. Just then there was a soft crash, and they could hear Harold cursing a bit. Betty and Jason both went to help him clean up the pieces of the game and set it up. Anna got up, walked to the fridge and pulled out a beer, and then grabbed another one for Carl. She sat back down and they opened their drinks, taking a swig each. "So," Anna said, softening her voice, "I guess I'll tell you, because I have to tell someone. Um...so this morning, I went and-" "Game's on!" Harold shouted from the living room. Anna rolled her eyes and stood up, finishing her beer, crushing the can and leaving it on the island. Carl followed her, his own beer can still in his hand. He couldn't imagine what she had been on the verge of revealing to him. Nobody ever revealed things to Carl, and it was going to eat him alive the entire night now. Carl and Anna sat down on the couch next to Jason, while Harold and Betty took their seats. "When's Ashley getting here?" Harold asked. "She shouldn't be much longer, let's just get started," Jason said, handing Harold the dice before looking at his brother, "So...how's it going, looking for a job and all? It's a tough economy right now." "Seriously? Immediately? Just like that?" Carl asked, "No 'hey, you look good' or 'what've you been up to lately?'. Just instantly into the job thing, as if that's the only facet of my personality at the moment. You're no better than dad." "No, I'm worse than dad. I wouldn't let you live with me if you were unemployed," Jason said and Harold laughed, moving his piece a few spaces ahead and handing the dice to Betty. "Leave your brother alone, Jason, he's trying," Betty said, "That's all anyone can ask for right now, given the circumstances." "Circum-what...what circumstances?" Jason asked, before looking at Carl, who was covering his face with his hands, "Are you dying or something?" "This is the worst night of my fucking life," Carl whined. "Carl went to the doctors the other week," Harold said, "He's got anxiety apparently." "Well that's nothing to be ashamed of," Anna said, taking the dice, "I've worked with kids who have anxiety, they manage. It's rough, it can be rough, but it also doesn't stop you from doing anything. I'm happy for you, Carl, for managing to get that diagnosis." "...thank you," Carl said, actually smiling a little, "Besides, Jason is right, the economy is garbage. What with every video store going under, how am I going to keep the quintessential Gen X lifestyle I've grown so accustomed to?" "Well," Jason said, "Belle is starting a dancing class this week. She's really excited." "She choose to dance, or is that your stereotyped gender role you're forcing upon your daughter?" Carl asked. "There's nothing inherently feminine about dance," Jason said, "Look at Fred Astaire for god sakes." "I'm just curious if you chose it or she did," Carl said, sipping his beer and taking the dice, "I mean, let's face it, often times parents are the ones deciding what extra curricular activities their children are going to be involved in. It's a little rare a child comes home from school and goes 'mom, dad, I want to join the knitting club!'. That's all I'm saying." "The knitting club?" Jason asked, grinning, "She's a 5 year old girl, Carl, not an 80 year old midwife." "You know what I mean," Carl said, "I just want to know that she chose to do it." "She did," Anna said, finally stepping in, "She chose to do it. Are you going to go down your ladder or not?" Carl moved his piece down the ladder, annoyed at himself for having spoken so harshly about parenting in front of Anna, now that he'd felt they were getting along better. "Even in a board game you can't escape your eternal fate of going down," Jason said. "You know what, I have had it with your smarmy fuckin attitude, honestly," Carl said, "You think just because you made it, just because you managed to stick out college and get a degree that isn't a worthless pile of shit that that somehow makes me inferior, that it somehow means you get to belittle me!" "I didn't 'stick out' anything, I put in the time and effort that it took to-" "Don't give me the whole 'just work hard kids!' shtick, let's be fuckin' real here. I flunked out because I couldn't handle the pressure, ok? Because I have anxiety, and-" "Oh, you're already going to start hiding behind that and using it as an excuse for failing college like 10 years ago, seriously?" Jason asked. "Hey," Anna snapped, looking at Jason, then at Carl, "Let's cool it, ok? Can we just once have a normal game night?" "Not until he pulls his head out of his eternally tight asshole and admits that he looks down on people of his own age for not being up to what he considers to be a bar of excellence. You're so fuckin fast to past judgement on people you don't even know with problems you can't even comprehend!" Carl yelled, handing Anna the dice so she could roll and finishing off his beer. "This is bullshit," Anna said in a hushed voice, "I swear to god, you said tonight-" "I'm sorry, you're right, ok. And Carl, I'm sorry," Jason said, as they all cooled down and became a little more relaxed on the couch, "Just, take your turn sweetheart, we can keep this cool, ok?" Anna waited a second and then put the dice down without rolling, looking at Jason. "I'm pregnant," she said. All the air was sucked from the room, leaving everyone literally breathless. So was that what she had planned on telling Carl before they'd been called from the kitchen? It felt like it. Finally, after a few minutes, Anna rolled her dice and made her move as Harold polished his glasses. "Well," he said, "That's...uh...a surprise, but congratulations, indeed." "When did you find this out?" Jason asked. "This morning. I took a pregnancy test this morning because I wasn't feeling right and my period was a few days late." "Hello?" a voice called from the foyer, as Ashley and a woman came walking into the living room. Everyone stopped and looked at her, the news of Annas pregnancy hanging in the air like an elephant in the room. Ashley stopped and put her hands on her hips. "What?" Ashley asked, "Is everything ok? Did somebody die?" "Jasons dignity might've been shanked in an alley, but no, nobody died," Carl said, "Who's she?" Ashley turned to the woman, smiling, and grabbed her hand. "This is Jade," she said, "I wanted to bring her to game night to introduce her to everyone. Jade and I...we've been going out for a few weeks now, and I just...wanted you guys to know. I wanted my family to know." "This is bullshit," Carl said, "She's pregnant, you've got a girlfriend, and I'm left here a fucking disappointment once again." "Carl, you're not a disappointment," Anna said, putting her hand on his shoulder, "You just need to stop comparing yourself to others, alright?" "I'm already sorry I brought you here," Ashley said, looking at Jade. Harold rolled his dice and took his turn while Carl got up and headed into the kitchen for another beer, Anna quick on his heels. Once in the kitchen, Carl had his beer in his hand and open, leaning against the fridge. "Carl?" Anna asked, approaching cautiously. "What?" "You have to learn to let things go," Anna said, "You're not your brother. You have to learn to just...be. If there's one thing working with children has taught me, it's that children are never anything if not in the moment. They experience life to its fullest because they have no past and the future's too abstract a concept. It's only when we get older that we become nostalgic; nostalgia is a disease contracted by people who've become overly cynical, who've been hurt too often, and who want to return to a simpler time, but fail to recognize they think of it as 'a simpler time' because it was the ONLY time." "...Wow, you're deep," Carl said, taking another sip of his beer, "But you're right, I'm not my brother. I'm better than my brother, actually. I think that's what pisses him off about me, is that he knows I'm better than him and yet I'm not living my life to its 'fullest potential'. I don't think he hates me. I think he hates what the world has made of me." "That sounds fair," Anna said, "Now come back and play the game." Carl followed Anna back into the living room and they both sat back on the couch as Betty was now taking her turn. Harold was lightyears ahead of them; seemed like everyone tonight was destined to hit a chute. Jason was trailing, but not by much, just like real life. "I can't believe you're pregnant again, "Betty said as she handed the dice to Anna. Ashley turned to look at her. "You're pregnant again?" she asked, then turning to Jason, added, "I thought you didn't want more kids." Anna had rolled the dice but wasn't looking at them. She, as was everyone else, was now focused on Jason, who was grimacing. "That's what he told me," Ashley continued, "Last week, we had a conversation on the phone and-" "Private and public, Ash, jesus christ," Jason said, running his fingers through his hair and looking at Anna, "I never said I didn't want kids." "No, he said he was thinking about having a vasectomy," Ashley said. "You're a horrible goblin creature," Jason said, "I just said I had thought about it, and maybe discussing it with you," he said to Anna, "But I wasn't sure and I wasn't sure what you'd think and like, now that we know you're pregnant I'm happy about it, I really am." "You sound positively thrilled," Carl said, grinning. "I AM," Jason said sternly. "Who you trying to fool, your wife or yourself," Carl asked. "Why didn't you want more kids?" Anna asked, "We'd talked multiple times about having a big family. You know I wanted to have a few more. I'm sorry, I'm just curious to what could've possibly spurned this decision." "I...I don't know, I guess I'm a little paranoid about money and...and I just..." Jason said, struggling to find words and finally looking at his feet, said plainly, "I don't think I'm a very good dad as it is." Even Carl was a little surprised to hear that level of honesty from his brother, who'd always gloated about how great he was. Carl, surprisingly enough, actually felt bad for him in that moment. Anna took her turn and handed the dice to Jason, who took them reluctantly before looking at Ashley, his brow furrowing, clearly pissed to the heavens at his sister. Nobody said much of anything for the rest of the game. *** Carl was sitting on the back porch deck, looking up at the stars, when he heard the door open behind him and Harold came out. Harold opened a juice drink, pulled up a chair and sat down beside Carl. "...we're not gonna have to talk, are we?" Carl asked. "Your brother admitted a flaw of his tonight," Harold said, "He admitted weakness. That's big, especially for him. That's real progress. That's better than therapy. That's what family does. It forces you to analyze yourself based on those around you, not so you can hate yourself, but so you can see why everyone else loves you so much," Harold said, taking a long sip from his juice drink before sighing and scratching his forehead, "Jason not wanting more children...it makes me sad. Everyone is obviously allowed to not have kids if they don't want them, and nobody should ever be made to feel bad for that decision. It's their life, their choices, I get it. I respect it. But...I think about you kids, and I think about how much you've bettered my own life...it really makes me happy. I messed up a lot, but I did one thing right, and that was having you guys." "Even on Family Game Night you feel this way?" Carl asked snidely. "Yes, because on nights like tonight, when we're bickering and complaining and venting...that's when you see yourself, and others, for who they are. That's how you learn to accept and love one another. Family isn't a deal set in stone. Nobody gets a fair shake. You're given to the family you've got, and while that hurts some people because their family is total garbage, when you have a family like ours...it's a very special thing." "Anna said something to me tonight about nostalgia being a disease only adults have," Carl said, looking at his shoes, "Is that why you have Family Game Night? Trying to recapture our childhood?" "You guys are grown up. You guys have your own lives. Jason is married, Ashley is dating, each have their own career," Harold said, "And...and while I'm perfectly happy and proud of them, they're not you. They're doing what they're doing because that's what society expects them to do. You remind me a lot of myself, Carl, that's why I'm so happy to have you around the house, to have you still living here, because it means not all my kids are gone yet. It means...I'm not a completely useless old fool." Carl watched his fathers face, the wrinkles on his forehead, him licking his chapped lips, and for the first time in his life, saw his father as an actually vulnerable person. "You're not a useless old fool, dad," Carl said, "And thanks, that means a lot knowing you feel that way. I don't plan to be this stagnant for life." "I know you don't." "It's just hard right now, you know," Carl said, "...honestly...Family Game Night is the only thing I really have to look forward to. Far be it from perfect, filled with anger and frustration and tears, but it's...it's when we're all together, and it's not a holiday, and that's just...that's not something a lot of families have. I miss our family as much as you do, dad, I really do." Harold stood up and handed the remainder of his juice drink to Carl, then put his hand on Carls shoulder and smiled as Carl looked from the bottle up to his father. "Choose what you want to do with your life. It's your life and you can do anything you wish with no judgement from me or your mother. You can shoot people and we'd still love you, especially if the people you shot were The Hendersons, cause, god dammit I hate them, but there's one thing you should never do, and that's feel ashamed of yourself. Never feel ashamed of yourself, Carl, because we certainly aren't ashamed of you. I'm going to bed. Goodnight." Harold turned and went inside, shutting the door behind him, as Carl turned and sat back watching the stars once again, finishing his fathers juice drink. "...Goodnight, dad," he said to himself.
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Family Game Night follows the Fuller family, a (possibly too) tight knit family who meet every Thursday night to play board games...and air their dirty laundry. Archives
March 2019
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