Boris had a horrible nightmare that night, one so bad that it woke him up and sent him to the kitchen for a glass of whiskey to calm his nerves. As he yanked the bottle out from the cabinet and poured himself a small glass, he sat down at the table and sipped from the glass gingerly, savoring the ease it brought him in this moment of pain. He groaned and rubbed his back, which was having a rather nasty habit of hurting more and more lately. After he finished the drink, he put everything back and laid back down in bed, thinking about the dream.
A dream which would soon be a reality. *** "What do you mean?" Boris asked, sitting at the table as Chrissy ate breakfast. "My grandpa is in town and he's coming to see me," Chrissy repeated, scooping up some cereal and eating it, continuing after she'd finished chewing, "he's going to come here and get me and take me somewhere to get something to eat." "Well that sounds nice," Whittle said, standing behind Boris and stirring sugar into her coffee with a small spoon, adding after taking a sip, "Why are you okay with seeing him and not your parents?" "Because grandpa was always nice to me," Chrissy said, "Grandma's been dead for a long time, so I was always the focus of his attention, and he, unlike my parents, wasn't dealing with something stupid like a relationship." "Fair enough," Whittle said, stepping away and getting a carton of eggs from the fridge. Boris pulled his cap off and scratched the small bald spot on his head before putting his cap back on and readjusting it to fit correctly. He took a sip of his coffee and then took a bite of his toast before he looked back at Chrissy and sighed. "Well," he said, "If anything comes up, you know you can call us and we'll come get you." "I know, thank you. We're just going to the park across from the school," Chrissy said, "But I think it'll be okay. I have to get ready for school." Chrissy took her dishes to the sink, washed them and then headed to her bedroom, leaving Boris and Whittle alone. Whittle sat down across from Boris and sipped her coffee as her stove heated up so she could cook them eggs. She smiled at him and raised an eyebrow. "You okay, man?" she asked. "I just...I'm surprised is all," Boris said, "She always made it like she didn't have anyone in her family, and that we were her family, and now-" "What're you scared of being replaced? Boris, we're not blood related to her but we give her a stable home, and in the long term, that's what she'll really remember and truly appreciate is having had a safe place to grow up in. She has every right to see her grandfather. I'm happy she has someone from her family," Whittle said, "I hate that I'm not close to anyone in my family." "You're not?" "You see my mom coming around?" she asked, and Boris grunted. She had a point. Just then there was a knock at the door and Whittle groaned as she got back up and went to answer it. She opened the door to Polly, who eagerly invited herself inside and plopped a small white paper bag down on the kitchen table as she went to pour herself a cup of coffee from the pot. "Donuts?" Boris asked, pulling the bag towards himself and opening it. "Yep," Polly said, "I got a bear claw specifically for you since last time I brought you donuts that was the only thing you complained about was that I didn't have bear claws, so to save myself from bullshit I brought one." "Gee, how totally generous of you," Boris said, pulling the bear claw from the bag and biting into it as Polly stood at the table drinking her coffee. "So what's going on?" she asked. "Chrissy is seeing her grandfather," Boris said. "Like, her actual grandfather? And you guys are okay with this?" Polly asked, looking between Boris and Whittle. "We're not her parents," Whittle reiterated, almost laughing, "We...we don't have much say in who she sees, especially if it's someone from her actual family. She's just our ward, not our child. We're just trying to give her a safe space to grow in while her parents figure some shit out." "They actually signed off on this weird little love in?" Polly asked. "They had to, otherwise we were harboring a minor, and that's, like, really illegal," Whittle said, finishing her coffee and standing up, "I have to get dressed. I have a second interview today and I have to be there in an hour. You two behave yourselves." "Yes mom," they both said as she walked off. As soon as Whittle was down the hall and out of immediate earshot, Polly looked at Boris. "So...spying on the meet up?" Polly asked. "You can read my mind," Boris said, standing up to get his coat, "Grab the donuts." *** Sitting in Polly's gremlin, Boris's hand in a bag of chips while Polly watched across the street with binoculars, she couldn't help but feel sleazy about the whole thing. She sighed, set the binoculars on her lap and turned to him, pushing her arm into the chip bag and grabbing a handful herself, shoveling them into her mouth. "This feels...wrong," Polly said, making Boris shrug. "I'm just looking out for her," he replied, "We don't need this man. He's her grandfather, but...anything can happen. She deserves to have adults looking out for her best interests. I'm just..." Boris trailed off and looked out the window. Polly raised an eyebrow and leaned forward, looking at him. "Yeah?" she asked. "I'm trying to be a better father figure than the father I actually was," Boris said quietly, making Polly's heart break just a little bit. She leaned back in her chair and raised the binoculars to her eyes, looking out the window again. They'd shown up here around the time school got out, so they knew anytime now Chrissy would show up. After another few minutes of no sightings, Polly lowered the binoculars again and looked at Boris, who was sipping from the straw lodged in the cup of a Big Gulp they'd stopped to get and share. "Don't you think this is an invasion of privacy?" Polly asked. "Who are you, Carol?" Boris asked, "She's the one who's interested in morally correct ways of going about things. I like you because you're so morally ambiguous. Don't go gettin' all goody two shoes on me now, okay?" "Yeah, but, I mean think of it, this is her alone time with the grandfather she actually has, the one member of her family she says really cares about her, and here we are just whole heartedly intruding on that space. That seems...I don't know, wrong somehow." "Do I look like a man who cares about what's right or wrong?" Boris asked, turning to face her, making her laugh. "Okay, Bruce Willis, calm down," she said, "I was just raising an observation was all," she replied, just as a knock came at the window, surprising them both. They turned to see Chrissy standing outside the car, glaring at them. Polly started to sink into her seat. "Don't move, she might not be able to see us," she whispered. "Oh please, she's not the one old enough to have cataracts," Boris said, leaning across her and rolling the window down; he tipped his hat at her once it was down and asked, "Afternoon, ma'am." "What are you doing here?" she asked, crossing her arms. "Just seemed like a pleasant day to sit in the car and look at the park," Polly said, "Is there a law against that?" "You knew this was my private time with my grandfather. What, you don't trust him? You don't trust me to make sound decisions about who I associate with from my own family?" Chrissy asked, making Boris's heart begin to sink at the sound of the anger in her voice. She furrowed her brow at him, adding, "This is really rude. I know you guys care about me, but this is not very cool." "Chrissy, we just-" Chrissy turned and began to storm away from the car, as Boris struggled to get free from his seatbelt and get out of the car, heading across the street after her, leaving Polly to try and follow them. As he approached her from the back, he reached out and grabbed her shoulder gently, making her turn back to face him. "I just want you to be safe, that's all," Boris said, "I know what it's like to come from a broken family-" "Yeah, but you're the one who broke it," Chrissy snapped at him, surprising him as she continued, "You weren't the child in it, like me." "I...I mean, that's true, but I..." Boris stuttered, trailing off. He had no comeback, she was right. She was completely right and he had absolutely no defense for his actions. They'd been well intentioned, but that rarely went over right. Now here he was, standing in the street, upsetting the one person in the world he'd tried so hard to protect. He'd yet again let another young girl down, and he felt a crushing pain in his gut. Chrissy sighed and looked back towards the park, at another old man sitting on a bench in a suit, licking an ice cream cone and waving at them. "I'll see you at home," Chrissy said, before heading off. Boris stood there and watched her walk away, like time itself had stopped. After a few moments, he heard a car horn honking at him, and someone shouting at him to get out of the street. He suddenly felt Polly's hands on his arm, tugging him off to the side, back towards the Gremlin. "Okay," she said, "Maybe we shouldn't stand in the street, god forbid people think we're senile." "...take me home," Boris said. "You got it," Polly said, as they both got back into the car and she started it back up, backing out and driving down the street. She didn't say anything, but she stole a few glances at him and noticed he had tears swelling up in his eyes. "Hey," she started, "Buddy, for what it's worth, I bet you're twice the grandpa that guy is." "I just keep doing it," Boris said, "I just keep fucking up and hurting people." "You were just doing what you thought was noble. Your heart was in the right place," Polly said. "How come my moral compass is so askew when presented to other people?" Boris asked, and Polly shrugged. "No idea pal," she said, "But trust me, I think what you tried to do was sweet. Trying to make sure she wouldn't get hurt in any way, even emotionally." "And then I hurt her emotionally." Polly didn't respond, and the two sat in silence the rest of the drive. Instead of going straight home, however, Polly took him to a small bar and grill and treated him to lunch and a few drinks. This seemed to lighten his mood a bit, and she was happy about that. She didn't like seeing her best friend unhappy. Afterwards she dropped him off at the apartment, stayed for a bit, played cards and eventually headed back to the home. After parking and heading inside, she headed for her bedroom, where she found Megan hard at work finishing the hot tub installation. As she entered, Megan looked up and didn't say a thing but did smile, and then she refocused on her work. "Boy what a day," Polly said, "Men are so emotional." Megan snickered a bit, and kept drilling. "...do you have a man in your life?" Polly asked, and Megan shook her head. "Nah," Megan said, "I'm bisexual but I don't really have anyone in my life right now." "Looking?" Polly asked. "Look," Megan stood up, changing her drill bit, "Um, I'm flattered, I really am. You seem super cool and really nice, but clearly there's reasons this would never work. Age, for one thing. I'm 24 and you're...?" "It's not nice to ask a woman's age," Polly said, making Megan laugh. "Polly, you're really great, and hell, if I were older or you were younger or something was different, then perhaps but, you know, people might think I'm a golddigger or something." "A golddigger? Do I look like I have money?" Polly asked, laughing, "Megan, you don't have to explain. It's just nice to feel like you can still like someone at my age and to not have it be so rudely rejected. So, thank you for that." "Of course," Megan said, "I should be done with this any day now by the way." "You wanna drop by when it's finished? Have a glass of champagne and relax? Mi casa su casa." Megan smiled and nodded as she pulled off her work gloves and let her hair back down. "I'd like that," she said. As Megan packed her things and left for the night, Polly waited until she heard the truck pull away and then, sitting on the side of the bed, started quietly crying to herself. She opened up a drawer on her bedside table, pulled out a bottle of painkillers and took a few, and then exhaled. She laid down and stared at the ceiling. Megan had made Polly feel pretty again. But her absence also made Polly remember just how alone she truly felt. Maybe the high of the painkillers would help a bit. *** Boris sat on the couch, reading a book when Whittle came in the door with Chrissy. Chrissy walked right past Boris and into her bedroom, where she quickly closed and locked the door. Whittle glanced at Boris, who didn't respond. She sighed and walked around the couch, sat on the corner of the coffee table and looked at him. "Look," she said, "I don't blame you. I think you thought you were doing the right thing. I just...I'm sorry she reacted that way, even if she had every right to." "Mmm," Boris said, nodding, turning a page. Whittle exhaled, stood up and began to walk down the hallway when she turned back and looked at him. "Boris?" she asked, making him turn his head to face her; she continued, "someday you're going to have to accept that you can't save everyone." As Whittle headed into the bathroom, Boris looked back at his book until a knock came at the front door. Boris sighed as anther knock came and he stood up, heading to the door. He opened it firmly, surprised, but happy, to see Father Krickett there. "Oh," Boris said, "What're you doing here?" "Lorraine is in the car," Krickett said, "She made me climb the stairs to come get you." "Get me for what?" Boris asked, an eyebrow raised. "Boris, it's...it's Ellen," Krickett said, making Boris's breath catch in his chest as Krickett smiled and said, "she's awake."
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Golden Years follows the exploits of a bunch of old people in a retirement home as they try to have fun, relax or come to terms with the soon to be end of their lives. Archives
April 2024
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