The banging had started again, just like the last few weeks, waking every dog in the neighborhood, cajoling them into fits of barking, filling the night sky with frustrated howls. Melanie groaned, sat up out of bed, put her tiara back into her hair and opened the window, leaning out to see where the noise was coming from. Same place as always...Paul. She crossed her arms on the windowsill and yawned.
"What time is it?" she asked, as Paul stopped his banging and looked up at her. "6:30 in the morning, I didn't wake you, did I?" he asked, and she smiled sweetly, shaking her head. "What're you building anyway?" she asked as Paul continued to hammer. "I'm building an Ark," he replied. "Why?" "Because he told me to." Melanie squinted, a bit confused. She stretched and stood up a bit straighter now, rubbing her eyes. "Who told you to?" Melanie asked. "Do you believe in angels, your highness?" he asked, and she nodded. "I believe in some sort of higher power, some sort of power that guides us along a path of eventual..." Melanie said, stopping and scratching her head as Paul set his hammer down and looked up at her, hands on his hips. "Destruction?" he asked, and she laughed. "No, that's not it," she replied. "Redemption?" "A path of...like, understanding, you know? It'll show us what we're supposed to do, so if this power tells you to build an ark, then you build an ark! It told me to find my kingdom, and that's exactly what I'm going to do! So what's the plan with this ark once it's done?" Melanie asked, checking the clock beside her on the desk. "Well, hopefully it'll be done before the flood," Paul said, picking his hammer back up, "I'll save you a throne, if you wish." The Ark now sat completed, over a year later, in Paul's backyard. And on this very day, the day that would forever change Melanie Irres life, it would in fact be proven useful. Paul wasn't wrong. A Storm was indeed coming, and his ark would be there to save lives. Just turns out it wouldn't be Melanie who needed the spot within it. *** Leah Wilkerson was having a decent enough morning. She had gotten her coffee with ease, managed to get a good breakfast in, and was now sitting in her office trying to fill out paperwork for potentially upcoming clients for psychiatric evaluation. Her hair pinned back, her nails painted well, she felt more put together than she had in ages, and it was nice. She didn't need a therapist, she was her own therapist. As she scribbled something down, taking another sip of coffee, she heard her office door knocked on heavily, and she glanced up from her desk towards it across the room. The door was locked - Leah always locked her office door in the mornings - so whoever it was couldn't get it, but she was still curious what they could want. So, Leah stood up and strolled across the room, unlocking it and opening it just a tad to see Melanie's face on the other side. "Miss Irres, what are you doing here?" she asked. "I need help," Melanie said, "Can I come in please?" "...well, I have an appointment in two hours, but, sure, you can come in," Leah said, opening the door further, allowing Melanie inside; Leah continued, "this is highly unusual, as I don't normally let people without appointments in to speak with me, but since I'm a friend of Emma's I'll make an exception. What's going on? Do you need a referral for something?" "I need..." Melanie said, wringing her hands together, "I need help," she repeated. Leah looked Melanie up and down. She was soaked, likely from the rain outside, and her eyes were red, like she'd been crying or rubbing them for hours. Leah leaned against her desk and motioned for Melanie to take a seat on the couch, which she did. "Are you alright, Melanie? You don't look very good. Do you want me to call someone?" Leah asked. "I have to lick your outlet," Melanie said, taking Leah by surprise. "Ex...excuse me?" she asked, almost laughing. "I have to lick your outlet," Melanie repeated, "I'm sorry but I don't have the time to explain." This...was going to be an interesting day for Leah Wilkerson. *** "It's very sweet of you to get Melanie a gift," Emma said, looking at the box Darren had put in her lap in the car; she continued, "Gus told me she hasn't been doing too well. She moved in with him for a bit until she feels her apartment in safe again, which I completely understand, but he says she's an absolute nervous wreck, like she's on the verge of a total breakdown." "I would expect no less after what she's been through," Darren said, "She needs to know we care about her. I'm not going to hold what happened to me against her, it wasn't her fault. That girl was unhinged. I'm just glad everyone got out of it okay." Emma smiled and laid her head on his shoulder as he drove. She hadn't been this happy with him in so long, and it felt great to be close to him again. She knew he was right...easy as it would've been to blame Melanie, it wasn't fair. After all, she had enough to deal with as it was. "So what'd you get her?" Emma asked. "Wouldn't you like to know," Darren replied, smirking. As they pulled up to the apartment complex, they could see Gus sitting on the steps outside with Bea, her drinking an ale and him drinking a soda, a bag of chips open in front of them, and an umbrella propped up overhead. Darren parked and got out, Emma following him, as they approached Gus and Bea. "Hey," Gus said, "What're you two doin' here?" "We're here to see Melanie," Darren said, "I have a gift for her." "Well, that's a shame, cause she ain't here," Gus said, "She took off like an hour ago. Didn't say where she was going or when she'd be back, just that she was going somewhere to do something really important." "What are you two doing outside? It's, like, going to storm," Emma said, pulling her coat up tighter around her. "We know, we like this weather," Bea remarked, grabbing chips from the bag and eating them noisily, "It makes everything really peaceful." Just then an enormous crack of thunder was heard overhead, startling Emma, who grabbed Darren's arm tightly, making him wince. Gus and Bea grabbed their things and started to head inside, while Darren and Emma headed back to the car. "Well, this stinks," Darren said. "We'll come back," Emma replied. "uh," Darren said, tugging on the door handle, "...that's...not good. I think I locked us out of the car." "What?" Emma asked, sounding annoyed, "It's about to start really pouring and you locked us out of the car?!" "It was an accident, christ, pardon me for screwing up," Darren shouted. "Hey!" they heard a voice shout from behind them. As they turned to see the house beside the complex, they spotted a man standing there, waving his arms in his rain slicker; he continued, "You folks need some coverage? You can come over here!" Emma and Darren knew they had no other option, so they hustled on over to the yard and followed the man past the fence and towards his backyard. "This is supposed to be the worst storm this city's seen in years," the man said, "I'm Paul, by the way. Hear you were friends of the princess. I am too, and you're totally welcome to wait here for her until she gets back, or til the storm passes by, whichever." "That's very nice, thank you," Emma said. "Just climb inside and you'll be safe!" Paul said, holding his arms out in pride, gesturing to the ark. "...you've gotta be fucking kidding me," Emma muttered. *** "You need to lick...my outlet?" Leah repeated, leaning against her desk, "Melanie, can you give me a sensible reason as to why you'd need to lick my outlet? I mean, first of all, it's dangerous, not to mention unsanitary, so you're going to have to really manage to convince me why I should let you do such a thing." "There's a storm," Melanie whispered, "a really bad storm, and a man told me I had to do it to save us from the storm. I had to save you from the storm. He told me that...that I had to...that you'd be really important to me getting better, and that-" "Who told you this? Are you taking your medication?" "Yes, but it...it isn't working well," Melanie said, something Leah could clearly see; she added, "but he told me to save you from the storm. I woke up this morning and he was in my friends bathroom with me, and he said 'Melanie, there's a huge storm on the way, and your therapist is going to be in danger, and if you ever want a real shot at getting better, you have to rescue her and lick her power outlet'." "...I....don't even know how to respond to that," Leah said, "This man, did he have a name?" "His name is Allen." "Allen...isn't that the man you said moved into the building recently?" Leah asked, picking up a pad of paper and starting to write things down. "He isn't real," Melanie replied, surprising Leah, "he isn't real, but he...he tells me things. He shows me things about...about me and my father, and...and now he's telling me to help you and I can't ignore him." "You have to ignore him," Leah said, setting the pad and pen back down, approaching Mel and kneeling on the floor so they were eye level; she put her hands on Mel's shoulders and smiled, saying, "You can and you will ignore him, because he isn't real, as you said. Melanie, clearly the medication, the therapy...none of it is working. At least not how it's intended to, and I really didn't want to suggest this but it seems you're having a complete break from reality, so I feel if I don't suggest it you may harm yourself by accident. I think you need real care from highly trained professionals. There's a nice mental home up in Lakeview, I used to intern there, and I know the head of staff. I can get you in no problem, and those people can really help you manage to discern reality from fantasy. I want you to get better-" "I want to get better too," Melanie said, crying now, "I do! But first I have to lick your outlet." "Melanie, just listen to me, you're sick, and you know you're sick, but you just said it yourself...YOU want to get better, and that's fantastic. I can help you do that, okay? Just stay here, I'm going to make a call to the hospital and see if I can get you in for a consultation as soon as tomorrow, alright? I'll be right back." Leah stood up and headed out of the room, leaving the door open as she exited. She walked to her assistants desk and began thumbing through her rolodex, realizing she'd taken her own home for reorganizing and hadn't brought it back in yet. As she looked for the hospital's number, Melanie watched, but her eyes soon glided towards the wall across the office, to the outlet by the desk. She felt a hand on her shoulder and looked up to see Allen standing beside her. "If you want to get better, if you want to go to the hospital, and if you want this woman to continue being here to help you...you have to do it," he said, "It's the only way." Melanie nodded, stood up and began heading across the room. She stopped dead center in the middle of the office and noticed Leah was staring at her from the other side of the door, phone to her ear. They were caught in a battle of wills, until Melanie glanced back at the outlet, and then raced towards the door. Leah dropped the phone, letting it hang as she too lunged towards her office door. "Melanie!" she shouted. "I'm sorry!" Melanie screamed, shutting the door and locking it, as Leah began banging away. "Melanie, open this door right now! This is not okay! You cannot be in there alone!" she yelled, but Melanie tuned her out and headed across the room, knelt in front of the wall near the desk, and looked at the power outlet. "...i want to get better," she whispered, as she stuck her tongue out and pressed it against the power outlet, holding herself there for a few minutes until all the power to the building shut down, all the lights went out and the only two people in the building - Melanie and Leah - were engulfed in absolute darkness. There was only the lightning strikes to brighten up the rooms through the windows, which helped Leah head down the hall until she found a fire extinguisher and carried it back to the door, where she began beating on the old doorknob until it finally fell off. Leah pushed her office door open, and rushed over to Melanie, still at the wall, tugging her away from it. "Melanie!" she shouted, "that was so incredibly dangerous! You can never do that again!" But Melanie, lying in Leah's lap, smiling up at her, merely replied with, "...you're welcome." *** "This is creepy," Emma said, shivering as she got closer to Darren in the ark, "...I'm sorry I yelled at you about the car keys, I know it was an accident." "It's fine," Darren said, kissing the side of her head, "I know things have been rough lately." "So what did you get her?" Emma asked, looking at the box. Darren smiled and looked at his shoes, "...uh...it's a collection of old medieval stories, very old, that was signed by some of the authors and illustrators. I..." Emma looked at Darren, who sighed and scratched his head. "I don't know how to explain this but...remember when we came back from the ren faire? And we took her home? You were asleep but she was telling me about her dad and...I don't know, Em, I feel very protective of her. Like...like she's a surrogate child or something. I know you don't want children and I don't want to fight with you on that anymore, because I want to be with you more than I want a family, but with Mel, it's like...she needs a father, and even though we're about the same age, I feel like I can sort of be that for her." "You know we only know her because she had the hots for you, right?" Emma asked, laughing, "This is kind of creepy." "Shut up," Darren said, laughing, "God! Besides, we now know that was misplaced emotions, given how she's been lately. I feel like I can help her, be that kind of father figure she needs, but...I don't know, maybe I'm being ridiculous." "I think that's really admirable, honestly," Emma said, taking his hand in hers and kissing it, "I really do. She's...turned our life inside out, but...in kind of the best way? It's weird." "We could stand to be turned inside out," Darren said, making Emma nod. "This is an impressive piece of work," Emma said, tapping her feet on the ark, looking up at Paul, "How long did this take you to make?" "Over a year, ma'am," Paul said, "and you're not wrong about the princess. She needs all the help she can get. What you two are doing is very kind, and I can assure you that she appreciates it deeply." Darren and Emma glanced at one another and smiled, as she leaned up and kissed his cheek. They could hear the rain pattering down around the ark, and yet no water got inside. Paul had truly built a decent shelter, and they were grateful to be away from the storm. Melanie, on the other hand, wasn't as lucky. She had weathered the storm head on, and had come away broken because of it. *** "It's letting up but I wouldn't recommend driving yet," the fireman said to Leah as they stood outside, an ambulance behind them. Leah glanced back over her shoulder at Melanie, sitting in the back of the ambulance, a blanket wrapped tightly around her. "Is she okay?" Leah asked. "She seems fine," the fireman said, "lucid enough, not in any pain, I don't think she got electrocuted." "I still don't understand why she-" "Actually, as it turns out your buildings power was exceptionally flaky. There was an old antenna on the roof that could've easily been struck by lightning, which had that happened, would've potentially caught the old wires within the building on fire from so much electricity coursing through them. She did the right thing. She shorted everything out with what she did and kept you guys from going up in flames." Leah was speechless. She thanked the fireman and then started to walk towards the ambulance. As she approached, Melanie looked up from her cup of coffee at Leah and sighed. "I guess I'm going to the hospital now," Melanie whispered. "Melanie," Leah said, taking her free hand in her own, "I am going to help you. I am going to help you get better. Being self aware of your illness is the first step and wanting to grow from it is the second. There's no end to progress, you just keep making more progress, but I'm going to be the one who will help you do it, okay? You saved our lives." "...i'm sorry," Melanie whispered, starting to cry, "i'm so sorry i'm so-" "Don't even say it," Leah said, "don't. You're fine, no matter how you are. Now we're going to make you even better, okay? We'll take you up to the hospital, get you all checked in, get you a room and create a health plan for you to work from. I'm here with you, alright? Every step of the way, I am your therapist...and your friend, and I won't let you down." Melanie smiled weakly, as she took the tiara off her head and handed it to Leah. "Please hold onto this for me," she said softly, "It was from my dad. Just keep it safe until I can have it back." Leah nodded as the ambulance driver shut the door to the back and got into the drivers seat, heading towards the hospital. Leah got into her car and sat there, looking at the tiara in her hands, feeling her eyes water up. She looked back up at the ambulance as it vanished into the rain and the grey fog, and knew she wouldn't stop until Melanie was better. That she swore to herself. *** "Name?" "Melanie Irres." "Age?" "27." "Reason for stay?" Melanie and Leah looked at one another, and Leah patted her hand. Melanie cleared her throat. "I'm mentally ill and I want to get better." And just like that Melanie was given a room at the mental home, where she'd be able to learn and grow, and come into her own. Gus and Bea would stop by from time to time, and she had therapy with Leah three times a week. Leah insisted she was the only one to treat Melanie with therapy, something Melanie had absolutely no qualms with. But it wasn't until a few weeks in that Darren finally showed his face. He was let into Melanie's room, the man outside telling him he to let him know when he was done, before giving them their privacy. Melanie was sitting on her bed, in her white pants and shirt - the outfit they gave everyone here - as Darren sat on the bed and scratched his forehead. "...it's been a while since we've seen you," Darren said, "I'm sorry I didn't come sooner, I feel shitty about it." "It's okay Darren," Melanie said, her voice sounding clearer than it had in months, her eyes brighten than before; she was clearly already doing better, even if only a little; she continued, "thanks for coming now." "Melanie, how are you doing?" "I'm...okay. It's weird not having any autonomy, but...at the same time, it's allowing me to do a lot of self reflecting and learning about myself, and who I was. I'm sorry you got stabbed because of me," she said. "I didn't get stabbed because of you, besides, it was worth it," Darren said, "hey, I wanted to give you something a while ago. but then, ya know." "I know." Darren reached into the backpack he'd brought and pulled out the gift, handing it to Melanie. She happily took it and unwrapped it as Darren also pulled out a box of chocolates and put them down beside her. She held the storybook in her hands and smiled at her before looking back up at Darren, smiling at him. "This is wonderful," she said, "thank you so much." "I figured, you know, you could use some escapism," Darren said, chuckling, "And I know obviously how much you like fairytales and stuff, so." Melanie handed the book back to him, pulled her knees to her chest and opened the box of candy. "Will you read me one?" she asked. "...yeah, yeah sure," Darren said, picking the book up and clearing his throat, turning to the first story, "Once upon a time, in a far away land, there was a beautiful princess who lived in the biggest castle in the land..." Progress, as Leah said, wasn't something with an end. But it had a continuous beginning, and that was something Melanie kept in mind. Something that helped her feel hopeful. Because she knew now that every single day was yet another day to start again, to get just a little bit better, and that was something that made her feel lucky. But she'd start on that tomorrow. Today she just wanted to hear a story.
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Royally Screwed follows 24 year old Melanie Irres, an average young woman...who legitimately believes she's a princess. Archives
July 2023
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