Kevin opened his eyes, looking all around at the trees and and feeling the cool breeze running through his fur. He struggled to get up, and after he finally did, he felt the pads of his paws soaked in what he thought was maybe a puddle of water? No. It was blood. It was his blood. He struggled to crawl, his fur soaked with crimson red streaks, and that's when he shut his eyes and didn't open them again for what seemed like hours.
*** Kevin woke, but not jarred or suddenly. He just woke, still in his cage, not even startled by the dream these days. He groaned, sat up, scratched behind one ear and then hopped to the edge of the cage. It was still dark in the lab, and Kevin could only assume it was still the middle of the night. He sighed and then turned to hop back to his spot, when he noticed Number Four coming in through the gate. "God, you startled me," he said quietly. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. I just saw that you were up," she said, "Are you okay?" "I....I had a dream," Kevin said, hopping back and sitting down, Number Four seating herself right beside him, "It's nothing unusual, it's just a dream I've had a lot from...well, from before all of this." "You mean before you were brought here?" Number Four asked, her eyes widening in interest. "Yeah...I generally try and shake it off when I have it, but since The Incident...I don't know, it's just become harder and harder to do and I've been having it more frequently. I guess maybe because I feel like such a failure, it just reminds me of that life," Kevin said. "The Incident wasn't your fault," Number Four said, "That was Dodger and Dodger alone. We've all come to acknowledge that. Haven't you?" "Obviously not, if I'm still blaming myself. I mean, I'm not really blaming myself for The Incident itself as much as I am for not sticking with my intuition, my gut feeling, of knowing it would all go south. I put my faith in Gerry and, in essence, in Dodger, and look what it got us. I'm not mad at what happened. I'm mad at myself for not seeing it coming." "What's it like out there?" Number Four asked, settling in beside him, resting her head on his shoulder. "It's beautiful, but it's dangerous. You'd like it though, I think. I used to live in a burrow, safe, warm, quiet. But...I think about life out there, how dangerous it is in comparison to here and...and I just...I feel like despite having to deal with THEM, it's still somehow safer in here. In here, I pretty much know what I'm up against." Number Four sighed and flopped her ears a bit, "But...but don't you miss having freedom? Isn't that why you wanted to go with Dodger? Isn't that why you were so interested in escaping?" Kevin furrowed his brow. "No," he said, "No, I wanted it because everyone else wanted it. I wanted to help others. I never wanted anything for myself." He lied. *** Kevin pulled himself up against a tree trunk beside a stream and using his paws, pulled some water up onto his fur, trying desperately to clean his wounds. It stung, and he winced, but he kept cleaning. He'd pull some water onto him, rub it into himself and then lick it until he felt some sort of relief from the searing pain in his side. He walked closed to the stream and dumped his head in under the water, then pulled it back out and shook himself hard. How long had he been out? How long had it been? Oh god, how long... Kevin turned away from the trunk and the stream and continued carefully hopping along his way, sniffing out in the air for his home. He needed to be safe. He needed to get cleaned up and figure out how to come back from this attack. As he hopped, he felt a sharp pain in his side, and from his fur, a tooth fell out and rolled around on the dirt forest floor. Kevin stopped and looked at it. That's right. The wolves. It was always the wolves. *** "I would very much like to go out there one day," Number Four said, looking gloomy, "My owner, she always was out in her garden, and sometimes she took me in the garden with her while she worked with flowers, but, it's not the same. It was such a controlled environment, just like this, that it wasn't reality. It was nice, but it wasn't real." "Real is overrated," Kevin said. "How can you say that?" "Because I've lived it, Four, because...because the world is a cruel, scary place, and unless you have someone with you, it's not really worth being in. Even then, when you have someone, it can still not be worth being in..." "Well than," Number Four said, nuzzling his cheek with her pink nose, "Isn't it good you have me?" Kevin blushed and put one of his paws on top of hers, sighing. "It isn't that I don't want you to not see it. It's beautiful. But I don't want anything to happen to you, especially after The Incident. If anything, Fern dying should prove to us all that we may be special, we may be important, but we're not immortal. We can die like anything else. Nothing in this world lives forever," Kevin said softly, "Especially not the things you wish would." Number Four looked up at him, confused, but he didn't go on. He just glanced away. So, instead, she merely cuddled up to him closer, shut her eyes and listened to him breathing. Kevin was right. The outside world is beautiful and wonderful, but so is being with a rabbit she so dearly cared about. Being right here with Kevin, why this was just fine too. Kevin waited for her to fall asleep before he looked around the lab. Number Two seemed to be awake, but was just eating some of the hay in his cage, completely unaware of those around him. Gerry was asleep, but Six seemed awake as well, but just laying there, not saying a word, just staring off at the wall in silence. Kevin wanted to give them freedom. He wanted to help them so badly, because he'd failed to help so many others, Steve included. He felt like he let them all down. Sure, in essence, Number Four was right, he shouldn't blame himself, but he did. He'd always blamed himself. Always. *** The birds were suspiciously quiet as he approached his burrow. It was like they had vacated the area. One of the reasons he'd chosen this burrow was because of the bird companionship, because of the visual aesthetic in the fall, and because it was well insulated, but now...now there were no birds, and he just found himself slowly hobbling over broken dried leaves, each one crunching more and more under his paws. He poked his head into the burrow, and could smell it instantly. It hit his face like a ton of bricks...blood. Kevin lowered his ears as he entered further. "No, no no no," he mumbled to himself, heading in deeper and found a smaller rabbit laying cold and lifeless on the burrow floor, cold, with a vacant stare. Kevin put his paw on them and shook, harder and harder, "Lily? Lily, come on, Lily, wake up!" She didn't move. Kevin turned and looked around, then hopped out of the furrow furiously, his head craning in all directions, sniffing the air. "Harriet?!" he shouted, "Harriet?!" Nothing. He hopped along a bit, following a scent in the air until he turned past a tree and spotted another rabbit laying tangled in the roots of a tree, covered in blood, one of her back legs gone. Kevin approached her cautiously, tears swelling in his eyes. "Harriet?" he asked quietly, as he put his paws on her body and pushed her a little, "Har...harriet, sweetheart?" Nothing. Kevin just collapsed on her, laying with her for as long as he could. He knew he had to bury them, but....not yet. Just not yet. *** Kevin had only been in the lab for a few weeks when he first met Steve. He was listless. He didn't care about anything. He had no fight left in him. Then he met Steve, and he cared about something again, until THEY took Steve away from him. The way Kevin saw it, he could never have anything, because something would always come and take it away from him. Just as Dodger had done. He'd taken their escape from them. Kevin had let his family down, he'd let his friend down, and now he'd let the entire Collective down by not getting them out like he'd promised. So, sitting his cage that night, watching Number Four sleep, he could feel it once more. That loving feeling creeping in. That feeling he'd learn to fight, but...he wanted to protect her, and the only way to do that, was to never leave this lab. She was safe here. She was a Special Seven. THEY would never hurt her. So, Kevin gave up on his ideas of ever living outside again, all for the safety it guaranteed Number Four. Because...because he loved her. And as he laid beside her, listening to her snore lightly, he realized this wasn't such a terrible life. It ultimately doesn't matter where you are, as much as it does who you're with. So sure, he'd lost the chance at escape, but in return he'd gained something better than escape. He'd gained love. Frankly, it was worth it.
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The Rabbit Collective follows a group of lab rabbits struggling with their purpose, and hopeful eventual escape. Archives
October 2020
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